Captains Log: Star Date 08012012.. we have been adrift in the norefridgerated zone of Galaxy Suck for 4 days now. The crew morale is on the downslide and quickly become a safety factor. The food replicators are down. We lost all food supplies when it was jettisoned out of bay 2 like Spocks body in that one episode. We lost supplies as the attack of the alien life form known only as “thisshitsgonnaspoil” infiltrated deck 1. The crew staged a revolt against the cook last night, and she only survived by throwing poptarts and honey buns at them. Communications inform me that we were able to get a message to StarFleet. However apparently they are stuck in an insurance wormhole and we must be patient. I’m not sure how much longer we can maintain safety and harmony. Kirk out.
( aka it’s funnier when you realize my last name is actually Kirk)